AbleNET Quotables - The Best Quotes from IRC.AbleNET.ORG

#370    (5 up, 0 down)

[9:23pm] Tinnitus: Mike: When you and Bill wake up in the morning, who rolls out of bed and makes the coffee?
[9:24pm] CeramicDog: neither cause mike still has his lips around bills dick
[9:24pm] Tinnitus: Right. Cream for the coffee.
[9:24pm] shell: hahaha

#369    (1 up, 1 down)

Mike-: IE is the best web browser to ever be created.

#367    (3 up, 0 down)

X: [Vect] <josh_away> ill slice your throat then use your blood as lube when i skullfuck your dead grandma
[12:00pm] Vect: hello
[12:05pm] Generic|Work|: yo
[12:06pm] Tinnitus: Hello and thanks for that TLC quote from Josh. He's such a special guy.
[12:06pm] Vect: ha
[12:06pm] Vect: yeah
[12:06pm] Vect: he's sweet
[12:07pm] Vect: brings a tear to my eye
[12:08pm] Tinnitus: You know, that kind of dialog makes me want to recommend him as a grief counselor in a hospice.
[12:08pm] Vect: yeah.. or as a highschool counseler
[12:09pm] Tinnitus: Tenderly guiding youth onto the right path?
[12:09pm] Vect: mmhmm
[12:09pm] Vect: he'd be a great role model
[12:09pm] Tinnitus: Especially midget youth.
[12:09pm] Vect: oh, definitely

#365    (1 up, 1 down)

[8:05pm] Tinnitus: I think each woman is a mystery to be discovered. The rest use rohypnol.
[8:05pm] Anthony: did I just walk into something awkward?
[8:05pm] Tinnitus: No, we were discussing your speed dating technique.
[8:05pm] Anthony: oh ok then!
[8:06pm] Anthony: I'm having connection issues
[8:06pm] Tinnitus: Apparently.

#364    (1 up, 1 down)

[17:21] (shell): see siffy you need to go hang out with ant more
[17:21] (Anthony): I felt very disoriented by the both of you hehe
[17:21] (shell): so you can have tresured times like this
[17:21] (Anthony): no way
[17:21] (shell): treasured*
[17:21] (Anthony): she'd definitely cock block me
[17:21] (Anthony): ON PURPOSE!
[17:22] (Sifasa): hey now
[17:22] (Sifasa): i wouldnt do it on purpose
[17:22] (Sifasa): you need all the help you can get
[17:22] (Sifasa): i'd stay far away
[17:22] (shell): HAHAHA

#363    (4 up, 0 down)

[17:01] (shell): how's te wife?
[17:01] (shell): +h
[17:01] (vanik): eh
[17:01] (vanik): ok
[17:03] (shell): uh oh
[17:03] (shell): trouble brewing?
[17:03] (shell): what dd you do?
[17:03] (shell): hehe
[17:03] (vanik): hehe
[17:03] (shell): did*
[17:03] (vanik): nothing
[17:03] (vanik): i think she has The Mensturals
[17:03] (shell): oh
[17:03] (vanik): so i'm backing off
[17:03] (shell): bring chocolate?
[17:03] (vanik): hehe
[17:03] (shell): works for me
[17:04] (vanik): more like pepper spray
[17:04] (shell): hahaha

#361    (1 up, 1 down)

[10:00am] LA: Gelo has a bunch of fucking quotes here and I've got nothing.
[10:00am] Grommet: yeah but who ever knows what his quotes mean?
[10:00am] LA: And he's incomprefuckinghensible!
[10:00am] Vect: you don't have any?
[10:00am] gelo_: hehe
[10:00am] Vect: i could have sworn...
[10:00am] Tinnitus: Dude, I just submitted one of your witty ones.
[10:00am] LA: I have one with Gelo in it.
[10:00am] gelo_: i heard someone wrote a diary about it
[10:00am] gelo_: hehe
[10:01am] Tinnitus: You want a stand alone one? What's the fun in that?
[10:01am] LA: That's like painting a masterpiece and having some asshole frame your smock.
[10:02am] Tinnitus: Nice simile.

#359    (2 up, 1 down)

[09:51am] LA: <gelo_> i would my my head scratch off at the wall looking at this shit
[09:51am] LA: <gelo_> my=get!
[09:52am] LA: Good thing he cleared up that confusion at the end there, otherwise it wouldn't have made any fucking sense!
[09:52am] Vect: haha
[09:52am] Vect: well, he does what he can
[09:52am] gelo_: hehe
[09:52am] gelo_: just out of the blue
[09:52am] gelo_: hehe
[09:52am] Tinnitus: Indeed, LA. Now I have full clarity.

#358    (4 up, 0 down)

<Mike> my weakest organ is my skin
<Mike> can you guess my strongest
<Mike> hahaha
<Anthony> your weak organ is your organ
<Anthony> and yea I've heard it was skin-ny
<Mike> hahaha
<Mike> who'd you hear taht from
<Mike> this conspiracy can not be permitted
<Anthony> Mike, I can not reveal my sources
<Mike> tori the terrible?
<Anthony> Tinnitus, slightly.
<Anthony> Mike, maybe.
<Mike> youve spoken to her?
<Anthony> maybe.
<Mike> dont fool around like that anthonyt
<Anthony> it could happen
<Mike> i would hope your loyalty to me would prevent you from speaking to her in any way
<Anthony> so sex is out of the question?
<Mike> i dont find that amusing whatsoever
<Anthony> is that a yes?
<Mike> what are you talking about.
<Anthony> my bad Mike ...
* Anthony hides his Scooby-Doo costume...

#357    (0 up, 2 down)

<Mike> i was wating to meet this fiance
<Mike> she was having her birthday party
<Mike> but i left my phone @ home
<Mike> my boss wouldnt let me leave early to go to her party
<wolf> you have a fiance??
<Mike> no
<Mike> a bald man who doesnt like me does
<Mike> hahah.
<Anthony> so.... if he liked you...
<Anthony> he'd be your fiancee?